Fibromyalgia · Personal Log

I’m sorry it’s been so long

Here is a quick post to try and get me back in the swing of things, I don’t know about you but the longer I leave writing a post the harder it is to get back into writing again.

Any way, I am glad to announce that I am 100% off the antidepressants and have been for a few weeks now.  Now that I’m off of them I can see what they where doing for me.  My pains, while under control now, got worse for a bit and I seem to be getting more headaches.

I didn’t notice how numb the tablets had made me either.  Now that I’m off of them I seem to be reacting to things a lot more than I did before.  I can feel myself getting upset a lot easier.  Little things are starting to niggle at me.  And when people on TV or films cry I can feel myself well up in seconds.  When this happens it’s like there are two of me in my head, one me just reacting and the rational me.  And it’s like the rational me is there shaking it’s head and telling emotional me not to be so silly, but as much as I know that rational me is right it’s not as easy as that.

I am in a much better place than when I went on to the tablets.  I honestly think that antidepressants have their role in helping to treat mental health issues, but I don’t think they are the sole answer.  There is no quick fix, personally I think it’s something becomes part of a person for the rest of their lives.  That doesn’t mean to say that it’s something you suffer with for the rest of your life, something that’s always going to be in the very back of your mind.  If I could wave a magic wand and get rid of my depression, I wouldn’t.  It’s part of who I am and everything that I’ve gone trough from it have made me who I am today.  Learning about this illness has also tought me a lot about myself and has even made me better equip to help some of my friends when they have problems.  Don’t get me wrong it still sucks to have it and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but it’s not the end of the world, just a large change in it.  And learning how to cope and live with it isn’t easy.

I think part of the problem with posting on here is that I don’t feel like I have done anything worth writing about.  Looking about over the last few months all I seem to do is work, do a bit of house work, some gardening and watch TV.  I haven’t crocheted, or baked or even coloured.  I haven’t taken part of the creative part of me, and that’s no good for my well being (many studies have shown that creativity plays a part in good mental health).  So on that note I am going to get out of my own way and do some colouring.

IMG_0361

(The above pic was found on Pintrest)

I hope that how ever you are feeling you are coping.

Thank you for reading x

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